Rollercoaster

Travelling is both the most amazing and the most difficult adventure, an emotional rollercoaster. While it is an overused phrase, it makes perfect sense. One day I am going to live here forever, the next day, I want to go home… right now… I want a hug from my Mum and a vegemite sandwich, I want to eat roast pork with my family and fight over the crackling… and I want to see how much Immy and Zoe have grown and go to Healesville market with Carly and I want to eat fried rice with Bec and Brad and have an hour long D&M with Kirsti… I want to drive up the misty hill to Kallista and be hugged by all my kids from school and hear the staffroom gossip. I want to jump on the trampoline for hours with Aidan, Corey and Bailey until we all collapse from exhaustion. I want to go to a Thomson family dinner and sit and have a cup of tea with the Traceys… I would give anything right now to curl up on the couch with Jack and watch Karate Kid.

But… perhaps tomorrow, again, I will never want to leave the chaotic streets of Cusco, the daily parades and fireworks, always looking forward to the next big event. The burst of culture and community and reality that hits me each time I open the front door. The children with resilience an Australian teacher would be astounded at, an ability to get along, to give love to everyone and to never complain. I love so much the company of the wonderful people I have met here, though they will all travel onwards shortly too, perhaps to explore a different corner of the globe, perhaps to head home to all of the people they miss, and then I will have someone else to miss too…

I know it is pointless and timewasting to sit and mope and miss home, it is true, but sometimes it can’t really be helped. It isn’t every day, it isn’t even every week, but when it hits, it hits hard and heavy. And despite all of my wants and desires, if someone offered me free passage home right now, I know that I wouldn’t take it. I’m not finished travelling yet, I’m not finished learning about the world, and more importantly myself. In some ways I’m terrified of going home. How will I cope without James by my side almost 24 hours a day? Having to work 5 days a week again? Being surrounded by wealth and sterility? And it’s hard to really know how much I have changed, I think that will be a huge challenge in itself, figuring that out when I come home…

But hey… we will be here in Cusco for another 3 months… why don’t you come and visit me???